Of Rolls Royce, Local Government Autonomy and Other Fantasies

Published By Jerry Adesewo On May 6, 2025

Of Rolls Royce, Local Government Autonomy and Other Fantasies

Jerry Adesewo

In a country where Local Government autonomy is a recurring mantra of governance reform, one might be forgiven for thinking that Nigeria’s local councils are finally free to chart their developmental destinies. But alas, like a Rolls Royce trapped in Kano’s pothole-ridden streets, autonomy here is a vehicle with no engine—majestic in appearance, but tragically immobile.

Then, enter the latest drama from Kano State, where the gods of governance appear to have gathered in a secret council to decree that each of the state’s 44 local government areas must part with a little over N15.2 million—totaling N670 million—for what some have dubbed the “Royal Restoration Project.” The purpose? To buy four brand-new Toyota Land Cruisers and restore two vintage vehicles—including a 1969 Rolls Royce—for the revered Emir of Kano, Muhammadu Sanusi II.

Now, let’s me clear: Emir Sanusi is my man. I fell in love with him since his First Bank days. That love blossomed when he was he became the Central Bank Governor. A man of style, intellect, and carriage. A monarch with a mind sharper than most and a voice that once pierced the conscience of the nation. He deserves respect. He deserves prestige. He deserves, perhaps, a Rolls Royce. But should that come at the detriment of local government budgets already wheezing under the weight of unpaid salaries, broken schools, health centres that double as poultry pens and minimum wages that placed the citizens right below poverty line? That’s where the problem lies.

According to a leaked letter dated March 25, 2025, signed by one Abubakar S. Dabo on behalf of the Commissioner for Local Government Affairs, the funds will be deducted directly from the State/Local Government Joint Account. Yes, the same “joint account” that has become the graveyard of local government independence. The beneficiary? A private company named Sottom Synergy Resources Ltd., which will supply the vehicles and give the vintage wheels a royal polish.

Let us pause here and ponder. In a state where some rural communities still fetch water with buckets from crocodile-infested ponds, we are refurbishing a 1969 Rolls Royce. In a time when local government secretariats double as museums of abandoned projects, we are rolling out Toyota VXRs like it’s an auto show in Geneva.

But maybe, just maybe, this is all a big misunderstanding. Maybe someone hacked into the Ministry’s email server and drafted the letter after binge-watching too many episodes of The Crown. Maybe the Commissioner was merely conveying the aspirations of a Nollywood scriptwriter looking to pitch The Return of the Emir’s Motorcade.

Because surely, a people-oriented government like that of Kano State, renowned for its ‘Kwakwansiya philosophy’ and recent attempts at reform and inclusion, would not mortgage the future of 44 LGAs to fund a car makeover, would it?

I, for one, pray this is not true. I await, with bated breath, a clarifying statement—perhaps even a meme-worthy denial—from the Kano State Government. Please, come out and say it: “It’s fake news!” Say the letter was a clerical error. Blame AI. Blame witches. Blame the ghost of colonialism. Just don’t let it be true.

Because if it is, then it means our so-called autonomy is not just cosmetic—it’s been spray-painted on a vintage Rolls Royce, destined to cruise through the poverty of the masses, while waving the banner of royal modernity.

Did I hear someone whisper, “there will always be the poor in the society?”

And that, my friends, is not satire. It’s a tragedy.

Of Rolls Royce, Local Government Autonomy and Other Fantasies